On one of the shelves in one of the rooms sit Domin’s urn. To the right of the urn is a big wooden photo frame encasing 9 smaller pictures of her. Her harness, leash, water bottle, bowl, shampoo, tidbits also lie on the shelf. I wish there is a way I can shrink her pram and place it on the shelf too, so she’ll always be surrounded by all her belongings.
Oh, there is also an ang-pow I got from my Dad for her during the Chinese New Year that just passed. On the ang-pow there are 5 Chinese characters – their loose translation is “go home and celebrate reunion”. Life and its little ironies!
I call this corner of the house “Domin’s shrine”. I come to this corner when I miss her, when I just feel like seeing or holding her, when there’s something I want to share with her, when I am feeling vexed and I just want to grumble about my unhappiness to her.
I sometimes fiddle with her belongings at the shrine. I shake the packet of unopened doggy French fries, I smell the shampoo (how I miss the smell of a freshly-bathed Domin!), I move her water bottle about, I pet the top of the urn, I hold the urn, I place the harness in my palms and smell it, I pull the retractable lease to make sure its still working…
It has been close to 3 months but I am still fighting a losing battle against the tears. I thought time was supposed to heal all wounds but strangely, the pain is not any lesser now than it was 3 months back.
I am not sure how long the pain will last and when the heart will stop crying. But one thing is for sure – no matter where I may call home subsequently, there will always be a place reserved for Domin’s shrine and all her belongings.
Oh, there is also an ang-pow I got from my Dad for her during the Chinese New Year that just passed. On the ang-pow there are 5 Chinese characters – their loose translation is “go home and celebrate reunion”. Life and its little ironies!
I call this corner of the house “Domin’s shrine”. I come to this corner when I miss her, when I just feel like seeing or holding her, when there’s something I want to share with her, when I am feeling vexed and I just want to grumble about my unhappiness to her.
I sometimes fiddle with her belongings at the shrine. I shake the packet of unopened doggy French fries, I smell the shampoo (how I miss the smell of a freshly-bathed Domin!), I move her water bottle about, I pet the top of the urn, I hold the urn, I place the harness in my palms and smell it, I pull the retractable lease to make sure its still working…
It has been close to 3 months but I am still fighting a losing battle against the tears. I thought time was supposed to heal all wounds but strangely, the pain is not any lesser now than it was 3 months back.
I am not sure how long the pain will last and when the heart will stop crying. But one thing is for sure – no matter where I may call home subsequently, there will always be a place reserved for Domin’s shrine and all her belongings.
Domin's jie-jie
No comments:
Post a Comment